Gods must be crazy

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I am a person of faith.

I believe, I pray, I marvel, I rejoice.

I look and I know that God has a hand behind this, I appreciate it and I give thanks. But, every once in a while, it wavers, things seem irreparable glass shattered and problems loom all around swallowing your dreams to spit out your bones, after picking their teeth. In those moments, I lash out at Gods, at his people, at the farce that is faith and choose to believe in the pointlessness of existence. It is in one such moment, possibly of weakness, or just my own version of revenge, that I wrote this:

Joffrey

 

 

 

 

because in my head Jesus looks like Christian Bale

 

Gods control, they don’t care. Picture God as the opposite of a nice mom (not those postpartum depression kinds that murder their kids) and you’ll know. All of the power, none of the morals. Somewhere in between the likes of Prince Joffrey and Jesus is God’s personality, the guy is just plain bored. This much I know for certain, God is a man.

We hope that he is kind and will reward faith with miracles. We paint him as a saint, and then go a step further, to give him a rival, an anti-god, the Satan to his holiness, a villain to the hero. This isn’t good versus evil, this isn’t like that at all. It’s just God- a single guy, living in his mom’s basement with the joystick that controls the world. Let me tell you, this guy is never a kind soul. This guy likes explosions, guns, bombs and genocide. The gorier the better. This guy is lonely and a little resentful. In his defense though, I am pretty sure he thinks it’s all just a game.

Game of Thrones: the Stark reality! …jk just read on

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My approach to TV show viewing in like a literature class, open to interpretation, discussion, debate and paper-airplane throwing and most importantly there is no right answer.

So I watched 3 seasons worth of Game of Thrones in roughly 5 days and then I watched yesterday’s episode and I died. Every single frikkin person I was rooting for on that show aka the Starks  was butchered and well let’s just say if it weren’t for Khaleesi I would have no hope for anything ever. Even considering how much of a junkie I am when it comes to shows, I think I’m invested in GoT waay to much for my own good. My own tweet sums it up nicely.

I don’t think I’m gonna make it to the next season- everyone on Game of Thrones

I really should’ve known better after Eddard was killed and worse yet, they had to go and kill the wolf :'((. I wonder how likely it is that George R.R Martin would’ve written a GoT version of PETA into his books to protest on behalf of those wolves. PETA and GoT do have a lot in common- they love nudity, boobies and fighting for causes. Khaleesi would look hella awesome as a PETA ambassador.

Khaleesi’s PETA campaign

I also found out that the actress I’d been raving about from the Elementary finale is Natalie Dormer aaaaand she plays Margaery Tyrell on Game of Thrones-brilliant she is. She also has a rather amusing and permanent duckface.

Just adding some hotness to your daily routine.

See what I mean, but I love her anyhoo.

I have also come up with a law that I shall hereby christen Riley’s Law of tele-viewing.

Riley’s law of tele-viewing states that “The more one despises an actor on screen, the more one is likely to love the actor off it”, in other words the amount of hatred you have for onscreen characters played by talented Game of Thrones type actors, is directly proportional to the amount of love you will have for them off screen.

Lena Headey who plays the “the queen we all love to hate”-Sersei Lannister, is just so much fun on the Comic Con GoT panel and on this:

If you have doubts about RIley’s law, well then you are a fool and I happen to enjoy Fool’s Gold( money I get by tricking fools I come across, NOT the awful Matthew Mcconaughey movie- I HATE THAT GUY). Another example of RIley’s law- Michael Rosenbaum who played Lex Luthor on Smallville. You have no choice to fucking hate his sorry bald guts on the show, but the bloopers are a whole another very real, very funny story. John Glover is awesome too.

See what I mean. Oh and it’s called Riley’s law because I am considering changing my nom de plume to Riley Pendergast. Good idea? Bad Idea? or do you have a better idea?

Also I hate Theon Greyjoy, I think he is a whiny little bitch non-man who deserved to get his junk hacked off.

I love the English people, they’re just so awesome- Ricky Gervais, Jeremy  Clarkson, those other guys who host Top Gear with Jeremy Clarkson, the cast of GoT (here’s a link to a gallery where you can see how much fun they have with their clothes ON). I know this is an odd thing to say, considering the British colonized my country and inflicted atrocities on us, but hey I don’t hold no grudges, especially if you look like this:

It’s crazy, the guy makes Jesus sexy. I’d let him colonize my country so hard.